Monday, September 13, 2010

swampy on parkinson (aug 2010.)

Thought I would tell you about my time on the world famous chat show Parkinson, but more about that later.

Ever since February of this year poker at Teesside has been very rewarding. A record of 24 finals out of 33 on my only night of play a Monday and the occasional Friday has been very pleasing.
Everything that has happened poker wise at Teesside has come up smelling of roses however this run could not continue and August was the complete opposite. Not one final table. One bubble and a few 12TH places and that's been about it. Towards the end of the month I did win a seat in the Teesside leg of the corals masters poker tour main event to be held at Teesside in early September.
Online I did win a £1000.00 main event seat which I am using for Blackpool in November.
The more observant of the regular followers will realize this is being written in September but for clarity the topic is August.
I did not manage the dusk till dawn £300.00 in August but sadly did manage the £1000.00 main event at Luton.
I played the same event last year almost to the day and busted out with pocket kings on a king 5 5 board, my opponent the legendary Dave Smith holding pocket fives.

This year I went out holding pocket Aces on a QUEEN 5 5 board my opponent holding pocket fives. Spooky.

Have you improved as a poker player?.
Are you a better player than this time last year?.
What aspect of your game have you intended to improve?.
Have you maintained the best part of your game or improved that aspect?.
Have you ironed out the small flaws and habits that have crept into your game?.
Have you realized what impression players in your regular game have of you?.
What have you learnt poker wise recently?.

A endless list of questions that could take a week to write if not longer.

However the one question that will end the pre mentioned list is ...
What have you done about any of the above?.

In my case the answer to all of the above is a resounding no and what have I done about the answer at best is very little.
I wonder if anyone even asks themselves these questions.

In 2005 -2008 I was on top of my game. My results nationally were ok or slightly better than average, at local level second to none and I say that with out fear of contradiction.
2oo9 was a really bad year poker wise both at home here in the north east and on my travels.
I had many deep conversations with people in poker who's opinions I really value regarding the lack of success, the change in my game etc.
Eventually between friends and more importantly myself the tweaks were made, the little issues identified and ironed out and with that the results this year have returned.
So that's that sorted one would think, a little blip, identified and fixed easy, one would think.

But it is not. Today I am a better player than I was in 2009 but not better than I was in 2008. That is a fact and true at that.

Every poker player has a skill and the more elite among us have several.

I have one.
I am not a gambler I actually dislike gambling which for a poker player you would think it is a contradiction, but it is not.
If anyone has seen me play roulette form a orderly queue.
If anyone has seen me play blackjack in the last 5 years form a orderly queue.

When i said every poker player has a skill here is mine.
I can read people to level that some people will never get to in there life's.
Mix that with a brain that holds tells on people with a recall system second to non and that's me. That's why I am slightly better than average no other reason.

So when someone points out to you that you are not at the level you were at previously and that is what you have been thinking for a while you have to take notice.

You have to ask yourself why?.

To me it is pretty apparent. For the want of a better saying I have become to nice.

At a recent competition which I entered on level two it took me another two levels to get over the niceties with my fellow players.
Hows you?
Did you hear about so and so...
Are you going there next weekend?
How did you do in Vegas?

Then a few hellos and hand shakes from the table behind you and by the time that all over it is level 4.
I than start playing poker and within a few levels have the run of the table, therefore giving myself a chance of progressing.

Wind back to 3 or 4 years ago I wanted to beat everyone in the room. I still do but 3or 4 years ago my mentality was I wanted the opposition to raise the white flag or call there mum asking for help.
I wanted to kill them psychologically.

I don't think I am doing this at the moment.


In 2007 I broke one of the best readers of players on the circuit, and this is when he was on top of his game.
Like I said every player has a skill Nick Slades is reading people and he is a master.
The only other poker player I seen read people better than Nick is a local lad called Ian Bradley who no longer plays poker.

A hand occurred in Blackpool where Nick went for his read to my all in re raise and Nick passed.
Sounds so trivial written like that doesn't it but let me tell you as far as poker playing goes it was the severest test I have ever faced. I passed the test.

What I am saying here is not that I am a better player than Nick slade as I am not, what I am saying that moment was a deciding factor in how far I could go in the game.
That was the acid test to what slight advantage I have.

So going forward no more Mr nice guy.
I used to box badly but I done it. Every now and again you would square up to someone who would have "fire in his belly".
You did,nt know what it was but there was fire there and you were in for a tough time.
There are poker players out there who have fire in there belly. Chris Brammer has it now, Sam tricket had it and may still have. When I first met Sunny Chatta he had it , Priyan de Mel has it from the first time I met him.
Locally Mark Trett has it , Dave Hudson has it , Tom Middleton has it , Chris Woods has it.
Mark Goodwin had it
and I could go on.
I had it but don't have it now, but it will come back.

So have you improved as a poker player from this time last week, last month , last year?

With all that heavy stuff guess now is a good time to tell you about my Parkinson experience.

Years ago I used to go every so often to the Vic in London.Play a few comps but primarily grind out the cash games with the weekend tourists.
It proved very profitable. A lonely journey, a bit of a grind but rewarding never the less.
Once I got to know Dave Maudlin he regularly accompanied me down to London and both him & I done very well.
Every Friday that we went we had the same routine.
Enter the Friday night competition, and once both of us were out we would head to a Local Greek restaurant for a decent meal before grinding the cash game.

This particular night Dave finished 7TH and we were late getting to the restaurant.
However as we had got to know the staff they fitted us in, on a little 2 seater table right at the front of the restaurant.
I grabbed the seat facing the restaurant with Dave sitting with his back to everyone.

We ordered our usual and chatted about our plan of attack foot the forth coming cash game.

As Dave waffled on about percentages in this hand and that hand(yawn) I started to look round the restaurant and paid close attention to the noisy table right at the back. I could not make out who they were as the restaurant was quite busy.
However as people made there way home and a clearer view was secured I couldn't believe who was making all that noise.
Non other than...

Des O'conner.

The world famous Des who had major hits with dic a dum dum and I believe.

Now at this point Dave had not even bothered to look round and had no idea the world famous Des was sat behind him.

I so wanted to say something to Dave but then my mind started thinking.

MMM a cunning plan.

About 10 minutes later off goes Des to the loo.

"Just nipping to the loo" I tell Dave.

Once in the said little boys room there stands Des at the urinals with his dic a dum dum in is hands.
I sensibly wait.

Des goes to the sink and starts washing his hands.

"Des I exclaim, wow how brill it is to meet you, can I have your autograph. My mum is your greatest fan etc etc.

He pulls a pre written autographed photo from his inside pocket and hands it over.

Then I said...

Des your game for a laugh, I want to wind my mate up who I'm sat with.

After promising to donate a healthy sum to the variety club I hand me cash over and Des agrees to my request.

All I have asked him to do is come over to out table when we are eating and say...

Hi Paul, how's the poker going.

Simple really, I did tell him the answer would make him laugh.

Heading back to the table I sat down with Dave and our meal dually arrived.

About 10 minutes later up gets Des and heads toward our table.

He arrives and blurts out "hi Paul hows the poker going"

At this point Dave's mouth just opens and for once he is totally speechless

But after my reply his jaw drops to his plate , as I reply......

Hi Des nice to meet you again but do me a favour and fuck off as I,m eating my tea".

Des moves behind Dave and is pissing himself laughing.

Dave is staring at me as if I have just insulted the queen.

Question after question follow off Dave and I make some story up about advising on a celebrity t.v poker programme with Des on it.

He believes every word.!!!!

On his way out Des pops a bottle of wine on our table and as he goes out says

"I will give you a ring Paul tomorrow"


Many months later I was watching Parkinson with the golfer Sam Torrance as the main guest and lo and behold Des O'Connor was also on.

Sam Torrance was going on about how he hates fame and the intrusion on his private life etc and says he hates being disturbed when eating out with his family etc.

Des pipes up...

"Your not gonna believe what happened to me."

I went to this restaurant in London a while back when I was approached in the gents....


Until next time.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Topless for peace (June & July 2010).

Many of the people who read this blog know I am into poker, football horses and the like but not many will know I am passionate about world peace and travel Europe campaigning tirelessly, but more about that later.

Firstly apology's for having to do June & July's blog in one but I have been rather busy of late.

In Mays blog I left you all with a run of 18 out of 23 final tables at Teesside.
June and July were no different and I managed a further 6 out of 9 finishing in the following positions.
I also fitted in one Friday night where I finished second for £660.00.
So the run continues locally at Teesside and now stands at 24 out of 29.

I managed to fit in the monthly £300.00 deep stack at Dusk Till Dawn in June.
As regular followers will know winning this is competition is my only goal in poker.

I survived day one and reappeared with 50 odd other hopefuls hoping to grab the first prize of 25k.
Sadly the poker gods did not look down on me and I lost 3 races, twice holding pairs v ace big and once holding ACE KING v POCKET 5'S which failed to connect.

A big congratulations goes to "sugar" Ray Ryder who managed to involve himself in a 3way chop ending up with £13,500.00 the biggest cash in the north east this year.
A fantastic performance as coming back on day 2 he was the lowest stack, well done Raymondo.

Newcastle Grosvenor held there summer series festival and I played the £200 freeze out and the £300 main event.
In the £200.00 I finished 8TH for £250.00 and the main event in about 30TH for nowt.
However back to back final tables on the circuit so things were looking up.

Aspers at Newcastle held a mini festival but with a awful anti structure was very disappointing and got the numbers it deserved.

Next in line was the Coral Gala masters poker tour which was held just down the road at Leeds.
I only played the main event the £500.00 Freeze out.

This competition will always be remembered as the tournament of outdraws.
Daniel Trett got his ACES busted by Steve Holden's pocket kings,first card a king.
Quad 9's got busted by quad Queens on a 9 9 2 flop!.
I outdrew pocket queens with ak the list was endless. That's poker I guess nice to see the outdrawn players taking it in style.
I managed to make the second day with 17 other hopefuls all after the 12k first prize.
I made the final table with little difficulty along with Newcastle player Ross Johnson.
Ash Hussain was also another notable gracing the centre stage.
My game plan was not to get involved in too many pots with Ash as he is very dangerous with chips and one hell of a player.

That plan went straight out of the window as I doubled him up with JJ v his KK.

One by one the players departed leaving 4 of us left. Me and Ash were hanging on for dear life as the two others had mountains of chips.
Then a hand occurred that beggars belief.

The two chip leaders collided Ross and some other.
Mr some other who had 40% of the chips in play gift wrapped them all and sent them to the ever so grateful Ross who played the hand perfectly.
Ash went in third leaving me with a mountain the size of Everest to climb. One hand later it was all over I finished in second place for £7,230.00.

A awesome well played to Ross who played one of the best final tables I have seen for a long time and fully deserved his success.


Ray Ryder. (3RD) £13,500.00 dusk till £300 deep stack.
Ross Johnson.(1ST) £12,500.00 Leeds gala poker tour main event.
Paul Gardener (2ND) £7,2000.00 Leeds Gala poker tour main event.

Last year I had the pleasure of attending my good mate Dave Maudlin's stag do in Prague.

To be honest it was a class weekend , good craic but with non of the high jinx's and tortures that sometimes accompanies a stag do.
No arrests , no traffic cones up the bottom and no waking up to find every hair on your body had disappeared over night.

The Sunday before the day we were due home we all went for a cultural walk through the magnificent City of Prague.a awesome place if you have never visited.
We walked into the main square and walked straight into a peace gathering with over 1000 peace marchers.
A closer look at the marchers and there banners bought the realization the march was no ordinary peace march but a...

"topless for peace march"

All men and more importantly the women were topless.
Some had painted important peace signs over certain bits of there bodies , but some had not.
My top was soon off followed closely by Howie & John Cairns.
As Howie and John skirted round the edges I got right in the middle.

I am a great believer in "why look at a few pair of boobs when you can look at hundreds".

Right in the middle I got talking to some Swedish Guy who I Told in conversation that I had come from England especially for the march.
I was the founder member of the Teesside peace movement and 13 of us had travelled over especially to support world peace.!

This was a fateful mistake.
With in seconds and from nowhere he produced 3 t.v crews one from the premier t.v channel in the Czech republic, German channel R.T.L and Frances national news channel.
The guy I happened to be talking to was only the march organiser and to drum up publicity had grabbed the media and sent them to interview the leading peace activist from England.

With microphones under my nose and what seemed like every t.v news channels in Europe pointing there camera at me I quickly realized I was in the shit.
I have been in the proverbial many times and managed to come out of things smelling of roses but this time there looked like no way out.

In broken English one t.v guy said speech please and the crowd went quiet. They were expecting a inspirational speech, sadly I was speechless.
Looking round for support the remaining 12 were no where to be seen.

Then like a bolt of lightening it hit me.

( I am a massive Beatles fan and know all the words to all there songs)

I opened my mouth and out came...

Ev'rybody's talkin' 'bout
Revolution, Evolution, Masturbation, Flagellation, Regulation,
Integrations, mediations, United Nations, congratulations
All we are saying is give peace a chance

John and Yoko, Timmy Leary, Rosemary,
Tommy Smothers, Bobby Dylan, Tommy Cooper,
Derek Taylor, Norman Mailer, Alan Ginsberg, Hare Krishna
Hare Hare Krishna
All we are saying is give peace a chance

and at the top of my voice I shouted to the audience "what is our message"
they eagerly replied
"give peace a chance from the top of the voices followed by a round of applause.

Phew a close shave.

When we got back to our hotel the receptionist shouted us over.
"I have just seen you on the news. I am so sorry I thought you lot were just a load of drunken Englishmen on a stag do or something, I did not realize you were hear for world peace


If you google or you tube topless for peace 2009 Czech you can see my interview.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Dick Turpin on the M6. (May 2010.)

Dick Turpin is alive and well and roams somewhere near the M6, but more about that later.

At the end of April I was on some run at Teeside on a Monday , having final tabled something like 10 out of 12 Monday competitions.
So Monday the 3RD of May was important to see if the run could continue. Sadly the end was nigh and even tho with my best effort I bubbled in 8TH place. A bubble prize was gratefully received £60.00, so a profit of £20.00.
Does this actually qualify as a cash!!!.

When you fall of your bike you have two options. Buy a new bike or get back on the old one.
I chose the latter and a few days later I headed up to Newcastle to play the Circus £75.00 freezeout.

This was held the same day as the Gala tour Bristol's main event, but with the poker stars event starting three days later I really wanted to be fresh for the stars event.

The circus casino is a old favourite venue of mine as previously mentioned and holds many happy memory's.
It was nice to meet up with some old friends who I hadn't seen for a while. It is only when you bump into people who you have not seen do you realize how many Friends you miss when so busy.

The tournament for me ran pretty smoothly down to the last two tables. I then had a card dead hour but was saved by the savior of most poker players.
I got moved tables at 16 players and met my saviour who is commonly known in poker as...
"I'm pissed but can play poker better than you" player.
His 100k to my 20k looked intimidating but a nut flush, a pair of kings and two pair later dispelled his theory of alcohol and you don't frighten me strategy is enough to win a tournament.

With enough chips to take most players on in the final I was able to play aggressively. A bit of luck outdrawing QQ with my 5 on the river however the rest was plain sailing.
When the dust was settled 3 of us done a deal with me and another taking £1100.00 and the other £940.00.

Since I re-started the blog back in December any one new to my blog would think this poker malarkey is all right. Turn up play ABC poker, collect most times at the end of the tournament.
When travelling, nick your expenses from the bookies or the cash games, have a laugh ,wind someone up and travel home.
And to be honest this year that is what has happened...

The biggest £500.00 competition in the U.K held to date.
Over 700 runners, held over 5 days.

I was so looking forward to this event. Held at Dusk Till Dawn on Wednesday the 16th.
I sacrificed the Gala main event at Bristol to prepare properly.

A early night the night before and a early start to arrive in plenty of time.
So perfect preparation.

However the poker god's had other plans.

The starting stack of 15,000 chips meant plenty of time and plenty of play. Sadly I did not see plenty of play and as for the plenty of time bit all I had was plenty of spare time.
After 13 dealt hands I was out. Of those 13 hands dealt I played 3.!!!

The 3rd hand dealt I was in the big blind. A small raise to 250 was called by the small blind and also by myself. I held pocket nines.

FLOP ace nine three (2 clubs).

Small blind checks, I check initial raiser bets 400, small blind passes I flat.

TURN 5 spades, I check opponent bets 1450, I call

RIVER 6 hearts.

So I come out betting 1475 and my opponent re raises to 5500.
Looking at his possible holding here trip 3's, trip aces or any ace jack to king.
There was nothing in his betting pattern that could of told me his hand and I had no option to call. I gave the re raise some thought but decided to err on the side of caution.
I called, I flipped my set of nines he flipped his set of aces.

The fifth hand dealt I raised with j9 suited no callers won 75 chips.

The 13Th hand dealt once again my big blind.
A scandi in first position raises to 400 his 5Th consecutive raise gets two callers and it is back to me in the big blind. I look at my cards QQ.

with two callers flatting the raise my best option here is to narrow the field. So I re raise to 1800. The original raiser the re raises to 3600 more the other two get out the way and it is back to me.
Now I am in a tight spot here. Calling is not a option. It is either all in or pass.
I honestly thought I had walked once again into aces at worst kings. I decided to give my decision some time before passing.
In this time the young scandi started to show a bit of apprehension. The longer I waited the more concerned he was looking. My thinking had changed about his holding I was now sure he held Ace King do I wanna race.
Darn tooting I do, "I'm all in I announce immediately followed by "call".
Oops got this one wrong expecting the aces or kings to be flipped over.

He proudly flipped ACE QUEEN OFF SUIT!!!!.

Five cards and four clubs later gave my scandi a nut flush.

The drive home was painful.

If you fall of a horse the best thing you can do is either buy a new horse or get straight back on.
I chose the latter.

The gukpt tour hit Coventry and a last minute decision to play the main event.
So off we set. Me, Dave Maudlin and Mark James down the M1 and right at the traffic lights.
After the poker stars fiasco I decided to pay in the main event as a late comer, don't want that early exit thingy again.

Day one.
Once again uneventful and I ended up coming back to 50 odd runners on day two in about 25Th position of 55 runners.
Once again I grind down to the last 30 or so and once again find myself getting low and once again bust out.
I don't seem to be able to gather chips these days as well as I used too, and often, to often in main events I find myself hanging on.

I played the two day £250.00 freezeout and managed to finish 6TH for £780.00.

During the Saturday night I bumped into Peekay from a worldofpoker who had finished work for the day covering the main event.
Asking him what he was up to now he had finished he told me a UB40 tribute act was playing in the function suite of the casino.
Mark James was on the table next to me and I leaned across and told him I had just seen Ali Cambell from UB40 in the casino.
Fifteen minutes went by and right on cue as the opening lines to Red Red wine burst out Marks face was a picture.
However nothing prepared me for what happened next.
A scouse gentleman who had overheard my conversation to Mark asked me did you say
UB40 are playing here, yes I replied.
Out came his mobile phone, he rang his wife.
"Hiya Doris your not going to believe this. UB40 are playing here live"
he whispers to me there my wife's favourite group.
I tell him at half past ten they are doing a book signing.
"Doris do want his autobiography signed" he asks.
So once off the phone from ten to ten all he does is ask the time.
As ten thirty approaches he asks me if I know how much the book is, £20.00 came the reply.
He whips £20.00 out of his wallet and rushes out the card room.
Fifteen minutes later he returns to the card room and says absolutely nothing.
My next ten raises he calls every one!!!
I eventually knock him out. He leaves with out wishing me good luck, don't know why?.

I played a £500.00 super satellite at dusk till Dawn for the wsop main event and with 10 seats guarantied I fancied my chances.
Once again so close so far exiting in 21st place from 125 runners, very frustrating my game at the moment.


TOM MANNION*********************** GUKPT MAIN EVENT COVENTRY (5TH) £8,800.00.
PAUL GARDENER********************* GUKPT £250.00 FREEZE OUT COVENTRY (6TH) £750.00.
MARK TRETT************************ GCBMPT MAIN EVENT BRISTOL (3RD) £8000.00.
DARREN MEYNELL******************** DUSK TILL DAWN £300.00 MONTHLY (26TH) £450.00.
CHRIS WOOD************************ DUSK TILL DAWN VEGAS MAIN EVENT (SEAT( £8,300.00.

A big well done to them all.

Not wanting to single any one out in particular as everyone above deserves congrats.
However Mark Trett finishing 3rd was some achievement considering this was the first Gala/coral event since his sponsorship.
Not a easy thing to do when in the spotlight.

Once again it has been a good month for my betting tips which are posted on
sports and betting section.
This month I made approximately 20 points profit. A first for me was the posting of my Australian football tips. Two weeks into this side of football tips I have recorded a profit both weeks.
I have spent two seasons studying Australian football lets hope the run continues.

Dick Turpin is alive and well and robs travellers at Tebay services near to the M6 in Cumbria.

Last November me and Latif Azis were travelling to Blackpool for the GUKPT main event when just passed Scotch corner we received a phone call from Howie who was travelling to Blackpool along with John the burglar Cairns and Mark there's only one Foggin.
They were half a hour ahead of us on the A66 across the pennines but happened to mention that they were stopping at Tebay services.
This was a fateful mistake.!!! PEOPLE NEVER LEARN!!!

I put the Morris Minor into second gear and sped like wild horses to catch them up all the time thinking what can I do.

As me and latte got to Tebay there was Johns car parked up.
Me and Latte sat wondering what we could do. Let the tyres down , banana up the exhaust the it suddenly dawned on me.
Like a eureka moment its Johns car he is stupid he will not have locked his car.

So I wander over to the car and sure as eggs is eggs the car is unlocked. (he had the car 3 days!!!).

So I dive into the car and think what should I help myself to, the sat nav, the mobile even the porn DVD'S on the back seat.

Then like a thunderbolt from the sky it hit me.... ..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

The boot
and whats in the boot???
3 suitcases and a lap top.

They were not there for long. The said itens were put straight into my boot and me and Latte were off down the M6 as fast as the Morris Minor would travel.

We were all stopping at the same hotel and with a few disguised phone calls enquiring about how far away they were it was not hard to time our arrival bang on cue as john pulled up outside the hotel.

John Boesfeild had been forwarned and was the willing camera man via his mobile.

We exchange a few pleasantry's and wait for the fun to begin.

Mark was first one to the boot.
"Pop the boot open John".

Mark fell backwards against the car parked behind, his jaw dropped as he screamed we've been robbed.

He then went into a repetitive shock syndrome as all he could say was "me lap top" over and over again.

Howie shouted at John " you cupid stunt, you have left the car unlocked at the services".

John went white.
"I don't believe it I had 4 grand in my bag, howie replied fook yr 4 grand I had a new pair of shoes and I have not worn them yet".

Finding it hard to contain the laughter I looked at Mark who had now fallen into the boot of Johns car and was rigid stiff.I honestly thought he was dead.

Howie ran off as if to run the 92 miles back to Tebay to see if they had dropped his shoes.

John was on his phone.

" Hello I would like to report a robbery"
" where Tebay services"
"I had 3 lap tops, 5 suitcases, 12 grand and 3 brand new pair of shoes in my boot"
(john always thinks ahead and was obviously getting his insurance claim into gear)

At this point nobody could contain themselves any longer, we just fell about pissing ourselves.

This was like a miracle to Mark who realized what had happened.

From his rigor mortis state he jumped up and kissed me and Latte like long lost brothers.
John put the phone down to the police and when they rang him back gave some explanation about how he had left his phone in a pub.

Fifteen minutes later Howie returned with a new pair of shoes from Wynsors world of shoes.

When we played the tape back Mark Foggin said me lap top 37 times before he collapsed into the boot.
Howie complained all week about how he had to fork out £15.99 for a new pair of shoes, twice as much as the one's in the boot.
John went to Halfords and bought a car alarm.

No one went to bed that night without double checking there bedroom door was locked.
Least of all me.!!!

Until next time.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

The fish finger lorry crash ( April 2010 ).

I left you at the end of March with a consecutive run of 7 final appearances on the final table on a Monday at Teesside, and a run of 13 out of 16 competitions at Teesside.
So come the first Monday in April (5Th) the pressure was on, especially as word had got out among the locals who were determined to halt the run.
Well cometh the hour cometh the man. I managed to do a 3 way split for £700.00.

With not being able to attend on Monday the 12Th I thought I would give the Friday a go (9Th).
Well cometh the hour cometh the man and I ended up with a 4 way chop for £450.00.

I was in Manchester for Monday the 19Th more about that later.

So the last Monday in April (26Th) the pressure was really on. Fatwa's were being issued by the local infidels and even bounty's placed on my head. Did notice in the re buy period I was getting called of everyone. I immediately counter acted this by going into super tight mode to confuse them all.
The first rule of battle is to confuse the enemy!!!

After all the dust settled it was a case of...

Cometh the hour cometh the man. I managed to secure a four way chop for £560.00.

During April I had planned to play a few events in Manchester as the gukpt hit town.
The obvious choice was the Mondays £200.00 event how could I fail. All I had to do was turn up pay my money and collect at the end, after all I win money every Monday.
Well that did not work. I have never had a tournament like it. The swings were .amazing 20k after 3 hands 4k after 10 hands.
This is how the whole competition went up down up down . I outdrew aces twice, lost with aces once , hit the nut flush but lost to a straight flush the list was never ending.
I eventually exited in 29Th place when my second 50/50 lost both times me holding a pair v AK.

Dave Maudlin played the £300.00 event on Tuesday and finished a creditable 7Th for £1300.00 so a big well done to Dave.

I travelled back down to Manchester for the Thursdays £100.00 event which flew past very quickly with no result and nothing to report.


This was to be my first gukpt main event of the year and the first time I had travelled with any significance.
The starting stack had increased from 10,000 to 15,000 chips so plenty time and plenty play in the game.

After the first 1 hour level I had managed to turn 15,000 into 7,000 when losing with top set v a made straight.
Against the same player I held aces v ak on a king high board , betting every street until another dreaded king on the river forced me to check call due to the size of the pot.
I maintained the 7k until level 5 before a missed flush draw and a few moves that did not quite work left me with 3.4k and in serious trouble of exiting on day 1.

With 6 levels left of day 1 I had no option but to grind and grind I did.
Somehow I managed to survive the day and finish up with 20k at the end of day 1 but almost the lowest of the survivors which totalled 53.

I was in serious need of a double/treble up which eventually came with ak v a pair a ace and king hitting the flop.
I was back in now but still way below average but managed to get with 30k of average chips , sitting with 90k while the average was approx 140k.

Now this is the hand that was to decide my tournament.
I was moved to the table that held Chris Brammer with his 300k stack and knew he was the player that was either going to make or break my tournament.
I have played with Chris just a few times but enough to know he was wary but very tricky to play against.

With me in the big blind a tight player limps and it come round to Chris who makes the standard raise to 12k (blinds were 1000/2000.
Off a 90k stack it was fine to see a flop with my holding of AJ and the limper also called.
This immediately let me know the limper's holding and it was pretty obvious to me that he held a mid pair or AJ or AQ.

The flop came J-6-4 rainbow.

I checked as did the limper then Chris bet 15k into a 30k pot.

I just called for a number of reasons the main one was to see what Mr limper did as he might of hit a set, he passed.

Now here I am in a pot with the ultra aggressive Chris holding top pair marvellous.

The turn bought a nothing card a six and still rainbow.

I again checked and Chris bet 20k.
Now I have to think about how to play from here and had seen enough to realize that Chris was holding air and should I check the river he will bet again to complete his ultra aggressiveness. I'm my opinion Chris was betting the river regardless what card came.
At this point I did consider the "all in" but I wanted the other bet chips, and the chance to win the tournament, and Chris was going to give me that chance.

The river bought KING , I checked he bet I called.
On there backs he held K 10 giving him top pair on the river.
Chris got lucky on the river I played the hand as perfect as I could and that's poker.

Chris went on to finish second and well done to him.

I eventually exited in 24TH place four places short of the money.

A word on Chris Brammer.
Chris took a bit of stick from some poker players probably due to his aggressive play and his quiet manner.
Let me repeat what I posted on awop poker forum.
Chris is the best young player to come through in many a year and I wish him every success in the future. Chris has a natural ability and the attitude to go as far as he wants in the game.

So Manchester came and went and thanks to the cash games some good % swop's and a more than willing bookie in Paddy power both me and DAVE Maudlin were able to head back home along the M62 with profit after everything was paid for.

May promises to be busy poker wise with another gukpt event with in travelling distance (Coventry), the poker stars tour hitting Dusk till Dawn and the start of the Gala/Coral poker tour in Bristol.

With a bit of spare time at the end of the blog seems I have room for some of the story's and tales to come out of the travels in 2009.

As most of the regular readers know we like a bit of a laugh us lot and don,t take life too seriously like Dave Maudlin Say's "there's always a story".

I am dying to tell the "how to train a pigeon" tale or the "great highway robbery" story but will leave than for another time and tell the tale regarding the "fish finger lorry crash".

One Friday night, the night before the £300.00 monthly event at Dusk till Dawn I was at Teesside playing the £10.00 re buy event.
Lee Dan asked me if I was going to Dusk till Dawn in the morning , I told him I was and he replied he was going early with Darren Maynall.
They were setting off early so they could use the hotels Gym and Sauna and spend a few relaxing hours before the tournament started.
Me and Dave Maudlin were also setting off early but for other reasons.

So theres me and Dave driving down the A1 at 8.30 in the morning and who do we overtake but Lee and Darren who are deep in conversation (probably talking about saunas and gym) and oblivios to who has just overtaken them.

Dave puts his foot down and we soon lose site of them way behind.
So out comes the mobile phone.

I Ring g Lee dan the passenger.

"Hi Lee it's Paul, where are you?

near wetherby why wats up

been a accident I reply on the M1 with a lorry , we have been stuck for 2 hours whatever you do , do not go on the M1, take the A1 until you see a sign for Nottingham.

Now both you and I know there are no signs for Nottingham on the A1.!!!

Lee for some bizarre reason only known to himself asks
"what was in the lorry"
fish fingers came the reply they are all over the road.

At 2.55pm 5 minutes before the tournament starts and 5 hours after the phone call Lee and Darren burst through the doors of Dusk Till Dawn still in there travel clothes and breathless.

What happened to you two I asked full of concern
you you b*stard
we got to a sign that said London 60 miles and Darren looked at me, I looked at Darren and both blurted out
"that tosser Gardener"

Aye till next time

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

cometh the hour... (march 2010)

The saying goes cometh the hour cometh the man, page 94 of thr new testament chapter 6 verse 4.


In February I left the blog with a run of 3 consecutive finals at Teesside in the Monday night £20.00 rebuy.

So the pressure was on come Monday march the 1ST to continue the run. Well cometh the hour cometh the man and I managed to not only final table but actually get a share doing a 3 way split for £820.00.

So the pressure was on come Monday the 8TH to continue the run. Well cometh the hour cometh the man and I managed to finish a hard fought 6th for £250.00 for 5 out of 5 final on a Mondays

So the pressure was on come Monday the 15Th to continue the run. Well cometh the hour cometh the man and I managed to finish a hard fought 4TH for £410.00 for 6 out of 6 finals on a Monday.

So the pressure was on come Monday the 22ND to continue the run. Well cometh the hour cometh the man and I managed to finish 7Th for £190.00 for 7 out of 7 finals on a Monday.

So the pressure was on come Monday the 29Th to continue the run. Well cometh the hour cometh the man and I managed to secure a 4 way share for £620.00 for 8 out of 8 finals on a Monday.

I attended one Friday night competition during this run and managed to do a 4 way share for £420.00, cometh the hour cometh the man.

During the run the monthly £100.00 freezeout came along. With 80 odd players in the mix it was never going to be easy. However a gift of some chips from one of the chip leaders and a bit of luck when holding A Q against pocket queens ( I hit a straight). I managed to make the final table but sadly low on chips.

My re found patience allowed me to win a 3 way all in with 9, 10, the board coming
A K J 7 2, my ten high holding up against 4,5 and 8,9 goldenballs strikes again or as Gary Collins put it "you run like god".

After the dust had settled I and 2 other players took £1700.00 and the chip leader took £2000.00.Cometh the hour cometh the man.
So 9 out of 9 finals at Teesside some consistency beginning to show.

The actual run over February and march is 13 out of 16 finals. One bubble, one 14th and one early exit.

After doing a guest spot on Mark Trett's excellent blog it set me thinking about the games in Newcastle, and remembering all the good competitions that I used to attend regularly at the old Stanley, Aspers and Grosvenor casino's.
With the appetite wetted I decided to attend the monthly £75.00 freezeout held once a month at the old Stanley now circus casino.
All I can say is what a excellent well run competition this is. With £500.00 added from the casino and 60 od runners it is fantastic value.
The staff are very player friendly and go out of the way to look after the players, nothing is to much trouble.
What was surprising was the amount of players who had travelled the 35 miles up from Teesside!!!. ONE ME!!!. Astonishing considering the added value the start and finish time, think the Teesside lot are missing out on a very good competition here.
I finished 14Th.

Rather than go on about the competition I would like to waffle on about something that crossed my mind while at Newcastle.
The subject that crossed my mind is how do you build a bankroll from whats available competition wise in the north east today.
When i first started to get a foot on the ladder it was easy to get a roll together. The competitions were plentiful with large pots and most nights if not all.
Teesside had 3 competitions all with over 7k in the pot.
Newcastle Stanley had a weekly £50.00 rebuy that generated in excess of 10k and a monthly £100.00 rebuy that regularly got over £15k.
Even the lower £20 and £25.00 rebuys regularly made over 6k and there was always one somewhere in the north east.
Now if you are a slightly better than average player it was not hard to get some money together with a decent run inside a month or two.
Once rolled up, players could then dip there toe's into the circuit and gain some experience and hopefully hit, then you were on your way.

But what about players in the north east today?

They are faced with low freezeout comps, low prize pools, less numbers and not one pot in the north east that regularly gets over 5k apart from the £100.00 freezeout at teesside and the £50.00 monthly game at circus Newcastle.
I think it is extremely difficult in today's poker scene to get going at all, and I think we will see less and less players breaking through.
Tom middleton, Mark trett are two who have come through to play regularly from starting off in low comps and building bankrolls, and for those others that play the circuit from our area, they seem to have some other sort of income outside of poker.

I do not know players from Newcastle like I used to but Teeesside does have it fair share of talent in Dave Hudson, Kieron appleby Martin Turnbull & Brett Angel who have the potential to go further but may struggle to get a roll together.
Have noticed Kierron has started to play the monthly dusk till dawn £300.00 definitely a step in the right direction.

Sports betting.
Been once again a very good month going approx 15 points and finish up on approx 97 points for the season 8 months into a betting year.
In December I posted a bet on that bore fruition this month. The bet was Barrow to reach the F.A. Trophy final at 16/1. Two weeks ago they dually achieved that. I also in the same bet have them to win @ 33/1 which is nothing short of fantastic .
For anyone wanting to view the bets go to the sports and betting section of

Trading activities.
Just started back today after taking a week off after wearing my shoes and nerves out for chetenham . The week was tiring , exhausting but very profitable.
As most of you know we are a team and we all seem to pull in the right direction.
We have the best trader in the country barr non and the fact is...

she is a woman which is even more amazing how she does it I do not know. The effort she puts in is awe inspiring. She now has a assistant which should help lessen the work load.

On that note will leave the blog for another month


Wednesday, February 10, 2010

There ain't no thing as a free meal.(feb 2010)

There ain't no thing as a free meal or is there! more about that later.


Poker is on the back burner of late and have only fitted in five tournaments.
The Monday night at Teesside is one of the only few competitions worth playing at the moment in the north east, but even so the pots are decreasing.
I fitted in four Mondays and final tabled three of those. Sadly 2 ninths and a eighth is scant reward for the effort. However some consistency.
I don,t expect to travel this year until May at the earliest due to trading being a bit slow mainly due to the recent bad weather.
The other competition I played was the £100.00 freeze out at Teesside and I will post the hand that ended my chance of progressing.
With approx 30 runners left I sitting with slightly average chips raised under the gun with 9, 8 of clubs. It was folded round to the small blind who raised to 8k (the blinds were 500/1000 and I had raised to 3400). Now I had every intention of folding here as I am well aware of the small blinds re-raising holdings, but now the big blind pushes all in for 5200 and my thinking was that I was against the small blinds holding at worst jacks or AK. I called the extra 3600 off a stack of 29k but was well prepared to pass if the flop was not favourable. The flop came J 6 3 all clubs, I checked my opponent pushed all in for 18,400.
I was pretty much sure that I was against one of four hands. Trip jacks, QQ, KK, AA with a definite suited club in the pairs. I eventually called and on there backs. No surprise to see two black aces staring at me. I was in good shape especially as the big blind had called with two black tens, so one less club in the deck. The turn bought the 3 of hearts to put a pair on the board and the river the dreaded ace to give my opponent a full house.
That's poker as the say.
Newcastle hold a £75.00 freezeout on a monthly basis and I am hoping to attend in march. I have some good Friends in Newcastle and some enemy's so look forward to getting back up there. I really do miss poker in Newcastle it is where I learnt so much, not just about poker but how to carry yourself both in victory but more importantly in defeat.


It has been a good month in betting. I entered February on approximately 63 points and finished just over 80 points. A 17 points profit this month is excellent. I have two consecutive runs of bankers , consisting of 7 out of 7 and 6 out of 6.
For those who do not understand a points system, a £100.00 level stake this month would of seen a £1700.00 profit for February. After 7 months into a betting year and at 80 points profit this would equate to £8000.00 clear tax free profit for a £100.00stake.
All my selections are posted on the excellent poker site
in the sports and betting section.

I was very honoured to be chosen as a guest on Daniel Trett's blog. With some excellent preset questions to answer I really enjoyed the experience. Daniels blog really puts this pile of shite to shame and I am sure it is linked to mine, but as I am hopeless with anything techno you will have to find the link yourself. If it is not linked I am sure Daniel will somehow provide link.
May I take this opportunity to wish Daniels brother Mark all the success in his year long sponsorship venture . Mark won the Teesside main event late last year which qualified Mark for a place in a playoff for a years sponsorship. Mark dually won the package and deservedly so. Here's wishing you all the best for this year bud.

With all the bad weather of late it has been a grind and a test of commitment. Nice to see a team working together all pulling in one direction. The weather along with the markets do seemed to have turned so onwards and upwards.

So with just about everything covered in February it is now time to answer the question " is there such thing as a free meal".

I was playing online in the 20 seat guaranteed satellite on dusk till dawns site. With 21 players left i typed into the site "don't forget the top 5 players receive a £50.00 meal and drinks voucher. As most of you know dtd Sat's play on even when u have won a seat for no reason what so ever.
My comment was met by "bullshit, really, nice one, brilliant amongst others.
To confirm my statement Dave Maudlin typed into the spectators chat box it was indeed true. The players on the tables took Dave to be the tournament supervisor and the expected occurred. With the 20 prizes secured all 20 players online went into super tight mode playing for the non existent 5 prizes of a £50.00 meal and drinks voucher.
when there was 19 left was having non of it, rubbish he exclaimed. I finally convinced him and he turned from the loosest player to the proverbial rock. One player said he did not want the prize and offered it to me should he win one.
"Whats your name he typed in"?
"JOHN BOUSFEILD I replied, OK I will find you on Saturday mate came the answer.

John actually played the event but sadly no one came up to John offering his free meal voucher, now that would of been the icing on the cake.

Finally if anyone wants to comment on anything I have written weather good or bad please use the comments section.
I will accept comments the only condition being you must not be anonymous like the fat spineless cretin who commented on last months.

Hope you all enjoyed this drivel and see you all end of march.

Friday, January 29, 2010

The best hat trick ever scored. (JAN 2010)

Who scored the best hat trick ever. Geoff Hurst maybe? Not even close but more about that later.

January a new start all bad habits put to bed. Unfortunately the weather put paid to any plans I may of had to play Bolton. With the winter snow not going anywhere when It cleared which was the week of Bolton it was time to start trading, after a a Xmas break, and rightly so trading comes first. Me and Dave managed to fit the £200.00 freezeout in on the Saturday but both of us exited early. However the 180 mile round trip was worth it just for the Indians truly scrumptious.
My attempt to win the main event at Dusk till Dawn ended very early when my trip 7's walked into trip jacks, as did the £50.00 when my nut flush was no good against the rivered full house.
Locally competition wise I have played 3 times but non cashes hopefully will have more time now that trading is up and running.

Found time one Tuesday to visit Newcastle and play the legendary dealers choice cash game. The game at Newcastle has become a bit of a talking point up here in the north with talk of some pots reaching 10k on many a night. I don,t know if all the crazies had heard I was on my way or they decided to stay in and do there nails, but that particular night did not seem any more reckless than any other cash game I have visited. Did manage to leave with a £800.00 profit so not grumbling.
Cash games at my local Teesside have been small but gentle, made a little from the game but not really put the hours in yet to determine weather to play regularly.

So all quiet in January and I can,t see February being much different as a busy month ahead.

Football tips which are posted on performed very well with a increase of 7 points for January bring the total up to 61 points for the first 6 months of the year.
Also been putting some other bets I do on the site which produced a 56/1 treble and also a good paying 6 timer.
Thanks to our man from Dubai I also gave out a snooker bet which was guaranteed even down to the frame scores. All I can say is the best 2 am phone call I have received.

Now I know you all wondering who scored the best ever hat trick in the history of football well let me tell you who.
But before I do maybe it is worth giving you all some background into how me and Dave Maudlin managed to place a bet on a hat trick at 19/1 and watch it come up.

If you rewind back to the opening game of the season our beloved Newcastle were playing W.B.Albion on the opening day. Dave rang me and we discussed how Newcastle would fair both agreeing a draw was the likely result (it is vary rare for us to agree mind). So we decided to place £50.00 on 0-0 my preference and 1-1 Dave's preferred choice. The result came 1-1 @ 6/1,nice. So we decided to keep the kitty going till it was dust but fortunately it grew and grew. You would be amazed at the things we have pulled out in Newcastle's games. Correct score 3-0 at 16/1, first goal scorer and correct score we just could not fall off. Any way the kitty grew and grew until just before Newcastle played Plymouth in the cup replay after drawing 0-0 (yip we had 0-0 & 1-1 covered)the kitty stood at £1300. With Dave going to the replay we decided to spend £200.00 each on a bet. Dave rang me from the ground and told me his bet, Plymouth half time/Plymouth full time at 20/1.
With less than half a hour before kick off I had to find something opened up betfair and scoured. There staring me in the face @ 19/1 was "any player to score a hat trick".
When peter Lovenkrands scored his third goal of the game in the 72ND minute the roar from the east stand could be heard in my living room 40 miles away. The bet paid £3800.00 plus stake return booooooooooooooooom.

So if any one asks me "who scored the best hat trick ever?".The answer will be

Peter Lovenkrands on the 13TH of January 2010.

Until next month don't have nightmares.