Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Topless for peace (June & July 2010).

Many of the people who read this blog know I am into poker, football horses and the like but not many will know I am passionate about world peace and travel Europe campaigning tirelessly, but more about that later.

Firstly apology's for having to do June & July's blog in one but I have been rather busy of late.

In Mays blog I left you all with a run of 18 out of 23 final tables at Teesside.
June and July were no different and I managed a further 6 out of 9 finishing in the following positions.
I also fitted in one Friday night where I finished second for £660.00.
So the run continues locally at Teesside and now stands at 24 out of 29.

I managed to fit in the monthly £300.00 deep stack at Dusk Till Dawn in June.
As regular followers will know winning this is competition is my only goal in poker.

I survived day one and reappeared with 50 odd other hopefuls hoping to grab the first prize of 25k.
Sadly the poker gods did not look down on me and I lost 3 races, twice holding pairs v ace big and once holding ACE KING v POCKET 5'S which failed to connect.

A big congratulations goes to "sugar" Ray Ryder who managed to involve himself in a 3way chop ending up with £13,500.00 the biggest cash in the north east this year.
A fantastic performance as coming back on day 2 he was the lowest stack, well done Raymondo.

Newcastle Grosvenor held there summer series festival and I played the £200 freeze out and the £300 main event.
In the £200.00 I finished 8TH for £250.00 and the main event in about 30TH for nowt.
However back to back final tables on the circuit so things were looking up.

Aspers at Newcastle held a mini festival but with a awful anti structure was very disappointing and got the numbers it deserved.

Next in line was the Coral Gala masters poker tour which was held just down the road at Leeds.
I only played the main event the £500.00 Freeze out.

This competition will always be remembered as the tournament of outdraws.
Daniel Trett got his ACES busted by Steve Holden's pocket kings,first card a king.
Quad 9's got busted by quad Queens on a 9 9 2 flop!.
I outdrew pocket queens with ak the list was endless. That's poker I guess nice to see the outdrawn players taking it in style.
I managed to make the second day with 17 other hopefuls all after the 12k first prize.
I made the final table with little difficulty along with Newcastle player Ross Johnson.
Ash Hussain was also another notable gracing the centre stage.
My game plan was not to get involved in too many pots with Ash as he is very dangerous with chips and one hell of a player.

That plan went straight out of the window as I doubled him up with JJ v his KK.

One by one the players departed leaving 4 of us left. Me and Ash were hanging on for dear life as the two others had mountains of chips.
Then a hand occurred that beggars belief.

The two chip leaders collided Ross and some other.
Mr some other who had 40% of the chips in play gift wrapped them all and sent them to the ever so grateful Ross who played the hand perfectly.
Ash went in third leaving me with a mountain the size of Everest to climb. One hand later it was all over I finished in second place for £7,230.00.

A awesome well played to Ross who played one of the best final tables I have seen for a long time and fully deserved his success.


Ray Ryder. (3RD) £13,500.00 dusk till £300 deep stack.
Ross Johnson.(1ST) £12,500.00 Leeds gala poker tour main event.
Paul Gardener (2ND) £7,2000.00 Leeds Gala poker tour main event.

Last year I had the pleasure of attending my good mate Dave Maudlin's stag do in Prague.

To be honest it was a class weekend , good craic but with non of the high jinx's and tortures that sometimes accompanies a stag do.
No arrests , no traffic cones up the bottom and no waking up to find every hair on your body had disappeared over night.

The Sunday before the day we were due home we all went for a cultural walk through the magnificent City of Prague.a awesome place if you have never visited.
We walked into the main square and walked straight into a peace gathering with over 1000 peace marchers.
A closer look at the marchers and there banners bought the realization the march was no ordinary peace march but a...

"topless for peace march"

All men and more importantly the women were topless.
Some had painted important peace signs over certain bits of there bodies , but some had not.
My top was soon off followed closely by Howie & John Cairns.
As Howie and John skirted round the edges I got right in the middle.

I am a great believer in "why look at a few pair of boobs when you can look at hundreds".

Right in the middle I got talking to some Swedish Guy who I Told in conversation that I had come from England especially for the march.
I was the founder member of the Teesside peace movement and 13 of us had travelled over especially to support world peace.!

This was a fateful mistake.
With in seconds and from nowhere he produced 3 t.v crews one from the premier t.v channel in the Czech republic, German channel R.T.L and Frances national news channel.
The guy I happened to be talking to was only the march organiser and to drum up publicity had grabbed the media and sent them to interview the leading peace activist from England.

With microphones under my nose and what seemed like every t.v news channels in Europe pointing there camera at me I quickly realized I was in the shit.
I have been in the proverbial many times and managed to come out of things smelling of roses but this time there looked like no way out.

In broken English one t.v guy said speech please and the crowd went quiet. They were expecting a inspirational speech, sadly I was speechless.
Looking round for support the remaining 12 were no where to be seen.

Then like a bolt of lightening it hit me.

( I am a massive Beatles fan and know all the words to all there songs)

I opened my mouth and out came...

Ev'rybody's talkin' 'bout
Revolution, Evolution, Masturbation, Flagellation, Regulation,
Integrations, mediations, United Nations, congratulations
All we are saying is give peace a chance

John and Yoko, Timmy Leary, Rosemary,
Tommy Smothers, Bobby Dylan, Tommy Cooper,
Derek Taylor, Norman Mailer, Alan Ginsberg, Hare Krishna
Hare Hare Krishna
All we are saying is give peace a chance

and at the top of my voice I shouted to the audience "what is our message"
they eagerly replied
"give peace a chance from the top of the voices followed by a round of applause.

Phew a close shave.

When we got back to our hotel the receptionist shouted us over.
"I have just seen you on the news. I am so sorry I thought you lot were just a load of drunken Englishmen on a stag do or something, I did not realize you were hear for world peace


If you google or you tube topless for peace 2009 Czech you can see my interview.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Dick Turpin on the M6. (May 2010.)

Dick Turpin is alive and well and roams somewhere near the M6, but more about that later.

At the end of April I was on some run at Teeside on a Monday , having final tabled something like 10 out of 12 Monday competitions.
So Monday the 3RD of May was important to see if the run could continue. Sadly the end was nigh and even tho with my best effort I bubbled in 8TH place. A bubble prize was gratefully received £60.00, so a profit of £20.00.
Does this actually qualify as a cash!!!.

When you fall of your bike you have two options. Buy a new bike or get back on the old one.
I chose the latter and a few days later I headed up to Newcastle to play the Circus £75.00 freezeout.

This was held the same day as the Gala tour Bristol's main event, but with the poker stars event starting three days later I really wanted to be fresh for the stars event.

The circus casino is a old favourite venue of mine as previously mentioned and holds many happy memory's.
It was nice to meet up with some old friends who I hadn't seen for a while. It is only when you bump into people who you have not seen do you realize how many Friends you miss when so busy.

The tournament for me ran pretty smoothly down to the last two tables. I then had a card dead hour but was saved by the savior of most poker players.
I got moved tables at 16 players and met my saviour who is commonly known in poker as...
"I'm pissed but can play poker better than you" player.
His 100k to my 20k looked intimidating but a nut flush, a pair of kings and two pair later dispelled his theory of alcohol and you don't frighten me strategy is enough to win a tournament.

With enough chips to take most players on in the final I was able to play aggressively. A bit of luck outdrawing QQ with my 5 on the river however the rest was plain sailing.
When the dust was settled 3 of us done a deal with me and another taking £1100.00 and the other £940.00.

Since I re-started the blog back in December any one new to my blog would think this poker malarkey is all right. Turn up play ABC poker, collect most times at the end of the tournament.
When travelling, nick your expenses from the bookies or the cash games, have a laugh ,wind someone up and travel home.
And to be honest this year that is what has happened...

The biggest £500.00 competition in the U.K held to date.
Over 700 runners, held over 5 days.

I was so looking forward to this event. Held at Dusk Till Dawn on Wednesday the 16th.
I sacrificed the Gala main event at Bristol to prepare properly.

A early night the night before and a early start to arrive in plenty of time.
So perfect preparation.

However the poker god's had other plans.

The starting stack of 15,000 chips meant plenty of time and plenty of play. Sadly I did not see plenty of play and as for the plenty of time bit all I had was plenty of spare time.
After 13 dealt hands I was out. Of those 13 hands dealt I played 3.!!!

The 3rd hand dealt I was in the big blind. A small raise to 250 was called by the small blind and also by myself. I held pocket nines.

FLOP ace nine three (2 clubs).

Small blind checks, I check initial raiser bets 400, small blind passes I flat.

TURN 5 spades, I check opponent bets 1450, I call

RIVER 6 hearts.

So I come out betting 1475 and my opponent re raises to 5500.
Looking at his possible holding here trip 3's, trip aces or any ace jack to king.
There was nothing in his betting pattern that could of told me his hand and I had no option to call. I gave the re raise some thought but decided to err on the side of caution.
I called, I flipped my set of nines he flipped his set of aces.

The fifth hand dealt I raised with j9 suited no callers won 75 chips.

The 13Th hand dealt once again my big blind.
A scandi in first position raises to 400 his 5Th consecutive raise gets two callers and it is back to me in the big blind. I look at my cards QQ.

with two callers flatting the raise my best option here is to narrow the field. So I re raise to 1800. The original raiser the re raises to 3600 more the other two get out the way and it is back to me.
Now I am in a tight spot here. Calling is not a option. It is either all in or pass.
I honestly thought I had walked once again into aces at worst kings. I decided to give my decision some time before passing.
In this time the young scandi started to show a bit of apprehension. The longer I waited the more concerned he was looking. My thinking had changed about his holding I was now sure he held Ace King do I wanna race.
Darn tooting I do, "I'm all in I announce immediately followed by "call".
Oops got this one wrong expecting the aces or kings to be flipped over.

He proudly flipped ACE QUEEN OFF SUIT!!!!.

Five cards and four clubs later gave my scandi a nut flush.

The drive home was painful.

If you fall of a horse the best thing you can do is either buy a new horse or get straight back on.
I chose the latter.

The gukpt tour hit Coventry and a last minute decision to play the main event.
So off we set. Me, Dave Maudlin and Mark James down the M1 and right at the traffic lights.
After the poker stars fiasco I decided to pay in the main event as a late comer, don't want that early exit thingy again.

Day one.
Once again uneventful and I ended up coming back to 50 odd runners on day two in about 25Th position of 55 runners.
Once again I grind down to the last 30 or so and once again find myself getting low and once again bust out.
I don't seem to be able to gather chips these days as well as I used too, and often, to often in main events I find myself hanging on.

I played the two day £250.00 freezeout and managed to finish 6TH for £780.00.

During the Saturday night I bumped into Peekay from a worldofpoker who had finished work for the day covering the main event.
Asking him what he was up to now he had finished he told me a UB40 tribute act was playing in the function suite of the casino.
Mark James was on the table next to me and I leaned across and told him I had just seen Ali Cambell from UB40 in the casino.
Fifteen minutes went by and right on cue as the opening lines to Red Red wine burst out Marks face was a picture.
However nothing prepared me for what happened next.
A scouse gentleman who had overheard my conversation to Mark asked me did you say
UB40 are playing here, yes I replied.
Out came his mobile phone, he rang his wife.
"Hiya Doris your not going to believe this. UB40 are playing here live"
he whispers to me there my wife's favourite group.
I tell him at half past ten they are doing a book signing.
"Doris do want his autobiography signed" he asks.
So once off the phone from ten to ten all he does is ask the time.
As ten thirty approaches he asks me if I know how much the book is, £20.00 came the reply.
He whips £20.00 out of his wallet and rushes out the card room.
Fifteen minutes later he returns to the card room and says absolutely nothing.
My next ten raises he calls every one!!!
I eventually knock him out. He leaves with out wishing me good luck, don't know why?.

I played a £500.00 super satellite at dusk till Dawn for the wsop main event and with 10 seats guarantied I fancied my chances.
Once again so close so far exiting in 21st place from 125 runners, very frustrating my game at the moment.


TOM MANNION*********************** GUKPT MAIN EVENT COVENTRY (5TH) £8,800.00.
PAUL GARDENER********************* GUKPT £250.00 FREEZE OUT COVENTRY (6TH) £750.00.
MARK TRETT************************ GCBMPT MAIN EVENT BRISTOL (3RD) £8000.00.
DARREN MEYNELL******************** DUSK TILL DAWN £300.00 MONTHLY (26TH) £450.00.
CHRIS WOOD************************ DUSK TILL DAWN VEGAS MAIN EVENT (SEAT( £8,300.00.

A big well done to them all.

Not wanting to single any one out in particular as everyone above deserves congrats.
However Mark Trett finishing 3rd was some achievement considering this was the first Gala/coral event since his sponsorship.
Not a easy thing to do when in the spotlight.

Once again it has been a good month for my betting tips which are posted on
sports and betting section.
This month I made approximately 20 points profit. A first for me was the posting of my Australian football tips. Two weeks into this side of football tips I have recorded a profit both weeks.
I have spent two seasons studying Australian football lets hope the run continues.

Dick Turpin is alive and well and robs travellers at Tebay services near to the M6 in Cumbria.

Last November me and Latif Azis were travelling to Blackpool for the GUKPT main event when just passed Scotch corner we received a phone call from Howie who was travelling to Blackpool along with John the burglar Cairns and Mark there's only one Foggin.
They were half a hour ahead of us on the A66 across the pennines but happened to mention that they were stopping at Tebay services.
This was a fateful mistake.!!! PEOPLE NEVER LEARN!!!

I put the Morris Minor into second gear and sped like wild horses to catch them up all the time thinking what can I do.

As me and latte got to Tebay there was Johns car parked up.
Me and Latte sat wondering what we could do. Let the tyres down , banana up the exhaust the it suddenly dawned on me.
Like a eureka moment its Johns car he is stupid he will not have locked his car.

So I wander over to the car and sure as eggs is eggs the car is unlocked. (he had the car 3 days!!!).

So I dive into the car and think what should I help myself to, the sat nav, the mobile even the porn DVD'S on the back seat.

Then like a thunderbolt from the sky it hit me.... ..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

The boot
and whats in the boot???
3 suitcases and a lap top.

They were not there for long. The said itens were put straight into my boot and me and Latte were off down the M6 as fast as the Morris Minor would travel.

We were all stopping at the same hotel and with a few disguised phone calls enquiring about how far away they were it was not hard to time our arrival bang on cue as john pulled up outside the hotel.

John Boesfeild had been forwarned and was the willing camera man via his mobile.

We exchange a few pleasantry's and wait for the fun to begin.

Mark was first one to the boot.
"Pop the boot open John".

Mark fell backwards against the car parked behind, his jaw dropped as he screamed we've been robbed.

He then went into a repetitive shock syndrome as all he could say was "me lap top" over and over again.

Howie shouted at John " you cupid stunt, you have left the car unlocked at the services".

John went white.
"I don't believe it I had 4 grand in my bag, howie replied fook yr 4 grand I had a new pair of shoes and I have not worn them yet".

Finding it hard to contain the laughter I looked at Mark who had now fallen into the boot of Johns car and was rigid stiff.I honestly thought he was dead.

Howie ran off as if to run the 92 miles back to Tebay to see if they had dropped his shoes.

John was on his phone.

" Hello I would like to report a robbery"
" where Tebay services"
"I had 3 lap tops, 5 suitcases, 12 grand and 3 brand new pair of shoes in my boot"
(john always thinks ahead and was obviously getting his insurance claim into gear)

At this point nobody could contain themselves any longer, we just fell about pissing ourselves.

This was like a miracle to Mark who realized what had happened.

From his rigor mortis state he jumped up and kissed me and Latte like long lost brothers.
John put the phone down to the police and when they rang him back gave some explanation about how he had left his phone in a pub.

Fifteen minutes later Howie returned with a new pair of shoes from Wynsors world of shoes.

When we played the tape back Mark Foggin said me lap top 37 times before he collapsed into the boot.
Howie complained all week about how he had to fork out £15.99 for a new pair of shoes, twice as much as the one's in the boot.
John went to Halfords and bought a car alarm.

No one went to bed that night without double checking there bedroom door was locked.
Least of all me.!!!

Until next time.